Past Miracles and Present Inspirations

I am recovering....slowly. I am happy. I am blessed....yet, like everyone, I get 'down'...then get mad at myself for 'going there'. ha ha I just had my 69th birthday which was one of the best! Many surprises and unexpected JOYS/BLESSINGS...coming from many unexpected directions. Frankly, after all the medical messes of recent years....I am just surprised to still be alive. ha ha

But this morning after our daughter, hubby & granddaughter left after spending the night and taking us to an awesome dinner....the house now seems so quiet and empty. I tried reading--enjoyable. I tried updating calendars and events--pleasant. Tried to use pets by hugs and cuddly talks...they were all SLEEPY. ha ha

It's too early to 'call someone to cheer up'.....that would likely make most of my friends....to chose NOT to be my friends. ha ha I reviewed old yearbooks...then an album and buried in all that until my eyes were blurry and my back/neck/arms ached. (have you ever done this?)

THEN while reading from some of my old collections---most of which I had totally forgotten about or even remembered writing----I came across something that INSPIRED and encourage my heart to hit my blog---in hopes that the following little story of truth might possible 'give HOPE' to some one who is hopeless or feeling down.

I guess everyone has read the often printed lists....about Thomas Edison having 1000's of FAILURES....even tho he was one of the greatest of Inventors Ever. Then were the lists about PRESIDENT ABRAHAM LINCOLN 'S gigantic list of failures to political offices and businesses---yet he became one of GREATEST presidents of the greatest nation on earth!

Well, in my collection---that I had forgotten---is the neatest Abe Lincoln archived story. I love it and it has once again....blessed me with inspirational smiles & joy.

As a young man, Abe Lincoln went into business with a friend. They opened up a little store. IT FAILED!

Very sadly they were forced to close their doors. Deeply disappointed with life, Abe told his dear friend, "you know, IF I could have a WISH today.... I would like to study LAW and I wish I had a copy of the "Lawyers Black Book of Laws" but guess it's not meant to be....because I don't have the money...all I have is 50 cents to my name."

The two men continued working in the store; cleaning, stacking, storing items and a few hours later an older couple came down the street in their wagon which was loaded with their kids, all looking very sad, worried. very tattered and forlorn.

They pulled their wagon up to the front of the store. The man timidly told Abe and his friend that they had no food and that the kids were starving and 'all he had to sell for money to buy food was an old wooden barrel' that was sitting on the back of the wagon.

The man asked Abe and his friend if they could possibly buy the barrel so his children could have food to eat. The two men then looked at the barrel. It was very old, weather worn, ragged and the rusty rings nearly gone---couldn't be of much use because it couldn't hold grain or water. But Abe was suddenly filled with pity and compassion for this starving family ....even tho he only had 50 cents in his pocket.

As he later told....this was his total worth at that moment was 50 cents but his heart couldn't let this family suffer any longer. So, actually sort of embarrassed, he asked the man if he would sell the barrel for 50 cents? Joyfully, the man jumped down from his wagon ....ran over and shook Abe's hand, saying, 'Oh, yes, sir, yes, sir...that would be wonderful, anything...just so my children can eat. Thank you, kind sir!"

Quickly Abe paid the man his last 50 cents for the old rusty barrel.

Very carefully, Abe slid the old rickety barrel off of the back of the old wagon....and then rolled it over to the side of their little store. He stood it 'up right' and heard a noise from deep inside the barrel of something sliding back and forth. He quickly looked inside. Deep within the walls of the rickety old barrel, Abe Lincoln found a copy of "Lawyers Black Book of Laws". (the lawyers training book of the 1800's)...a special blessing from God.

This little book eventually led Abraham Lincoln to become one of our greatest Statesmen and the President of the United States!

Moral: always 'go with your heart--- in helping and consoling others...regardless your own circumstances....many are worse off than you ---and you will never be able to 'out give God's gifts and miracles or figure out his mysteries."

And regardless whether our Wagon is loaded or empty, it all depends upon our perspective. His ways are not ours...and yet He is always there for us...our job is to 'Hang on for the long haul'. Be happy. May your wagon always be blessed!

How do you say, Humbled & Grateful....

With tons of hugs.... & praises to our Lord, to family and friends...to doctors, nurses, techs, science, medicine, hospitals, labs, scientists & inventors----all who had a part in my recovery.

Yes, I am thriving well. (didn't say without pain...ha ha....but doing very well...considering all that has been going on in my life to this point.) Six weeks and I have walked steps alone very guardedly through the house/patio, driven a very short distance...but with great wisdom and guidance still use walker or cane until each of these new knees CHOOSE to stop 'going opposite directions' occasionally. That's a FREAKY feeling, believe me! I practice all therapy constantly trying to 'do my best' and make this all worth while. I ALREADY have more energy/strength than I did before---and that is a miracle--one that I certainly never expected and a MOST WELCOMED surprised!

I have always loved my home, retirement years...but never so much....as after two weeks in the hospital with awful pain/wonderful people....

Between a wonderful husband--- and our daughter/granddaughter who came and stayed a week to help me RE-learn to stand...walk/motivate...I am humbled to the MAX.

(just in in case ANY independent, self-reliant woman has never been totally HELPLESS---believe me---there is nothing on earth so devastating to your mind. I am very sure that IT IS GOOD FOR US to be so humbled...but again...there is NO experience like it in life. Yet I have to say "I now am glad that I had the experience because beforehand...I FELT that I sort of knew the impact and compassion for...and of....other people who were helpless/down---but I learned that ---I really wasn't even close!!!

ONLY God and tears cling close constantly....and then inside our human brain --well, that won't shut up!!! pained thinking as well as body!

I learned WHY ....little people in the nursing home 'bob' their heads so much...instead of speaking. They CAN'T. They hurt too much, too deep!!! Their brains are still churning tho....

But HOOOray, and again I say hooray. Home Sweet Home....I am SO GLAD TO BE HOME! I was so welcomed by...my BIG FAT TOMCAT (named BC---because as a kitten he was such a little pest that we couldn't decide if he was a 'blessing or a curse'....ha ha, so for short, we named him BC----

well, he was STILL laying on my computer---when I returned home....where he loves to stay with me. As an aging tomcat tho---as most of you know... he loves to 'just FLOP' and snooze. He has barely left my side now that I am home. ha ha ....nice feeling of dedication---a soft, fuzzy, fluffy sweetie now.

The wild redbirds were still eating bird food outside on my window sill. this is something I have always loved. Mr & Mrs. Redbird couples will 'bill n coo'....kiss and feed each other, so beautifully. It's amazing to watch God's nature. Then we have the cotton tail rabbits who were still eating feed and grass in the early morning sunrise...just outside my bedroom window with all the other jillion song birds singing to greet me back home. Wow...Again, its so wonderful to be HOME...to be Alive....to have Hope...to be... healing.

I Shall Walk again....all praise to Thee Giver of good & perfect gifts!!! Our Lord!

I THANK YOU ALL from the very bottom of my heart. May you be blessed a 100 fold as well. His child, Gloria

Feeling small & insignificant.....

Facing double surgery tomorrow morning---yes, this is how I feel.




Yet, His Holy Spirit inside of me, rebounds and rebels...and 'all that I am' speaks in whispers to my heart.... to my brain.




I am HIS child....HE will not forsake me...He never has. We converse constantly---so why do I feel so much like a little grain of sand being crushed by the gigantic ocean waves of the tremendous raging seas before me?




Well finally (humm), my Father, whispers to me..."that's normal''...."that's why I am here!"
"I Do test your faith in Me----and just as it is written in Isaiah 41:10, thousands of years ago---I still ask that you......'Fear thou not, for I am with thee; be not dismayed for I am thy God' I will strengthen you; yes, I will help you; yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness."


****My moment of truth has come---surgery time. In child like faith...with a deep feeling of humility, intimidation and insignificance---Because He lives----I can/will CHOOSE to cling to His promises to get me through this horror. I do not take lightly that He chose awesome people to build careers around medical restoration and research that brings HOPE to hurting people everywhere. ......"to ME! Tomorrow---I test their skills.

Today, I lean on Him---- He is thee Creator & Giver of all good and perfect gifts.

The following verses WASH over THIS 'grain of sand' (me) and sends courage.... to handle the deep waters of a thousand emotions, through the darkness of this night, this hour and moment in time. And forever--- for each of us who believe. Some people have Favorite verses...which is super...but I have found that there are SO many that FILL the voids and situations in my life...that it's really hard to choose a constant favorite. Today's need...brings to mind a certain Scriptures---tomorrows needs bring forth another. these are my RIGHT NOW verses. ha ha---Help, Lord!!!!

Hebrews 13:6 The Lord is my Helper; I will not be seized with alarm---I will not fear, or dread or be terrified!

Luke 12:32 Do not be seized with alarm and struck with fear, my child, for it is God's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.

Also....FEAR is the beginning of WISDOM. (yes, Lord, I am trying to learn fast!)

Psalms 23 (my first memorized verses as a child in Vacation Bible School) constantly rings in my ears...my heart and my soul. For He IS my Savior...Salutation.

The Lord is my Shepherd.......I shall not want....

May we all, as His aimless sheep, constantly seek His voice in our Wilderness walk through Life. If it be His will...I will return to this blog in about 3 weeks. May You continue to be blessed.

"Fear Not!"..... or.....Fear a Lot??? ha ha

Our Bible tells us all, very plainly.... in the Old and the New Testament....365 times (one for each day of the year)----to .....FEAR NOT!

And the words apply very well for me...about death that is....I don't fear it....I just fear the PROCESS of GETTING THERE! (can you identify...hummm?) :-D
I just don't want any part of----Pain, suffering and mind boggling FEAR!
Please, Lord, forgive me for being Mortal!

Fear not........nope......I FEAR A LOT!!!

When a person is hurting severely....you CAN have comfort in KNOWING that our God is there with you---but it doesn't always remove the pain. It does not remove death. We all die. We all will go through some suffering, some more than others.

Today---I fear not death----I fear life!

Today---I prepare my mindset for MORE new surgery! Very, Very Painful surgery that I have already WITNESSED to the very fullest of pain and suffering to a very HEALTHY person, my hubby. Four years ago he had BOTH of his knees replaced at the same time! A medical improbability for his size and age. A medical miracle because of God's science, medicines and His awesome COVERING via awesome prayer partners.

Yet...in this process...I witnessed FULLY...as a giant man shook in RIGORS with pain and suffering as he awoke from surgery---six days unable to STAND. This giant of man, muscles taunt, shriveled up like a little mouse in pain, shaking from head to foot---with pain. Later that second evening, I watched with a frozen heart, petrifide in fear as both of this mans legs SPRAYED his hospital room BLOOD RED. Yes, spraying like a lawn sprayer. All STAT floor call went out for our room---the head on-call doctor ran in our door....sees the scene----TURNS GREEN---runs down the hall.

Thinking back---its somewhat funny---at the time, HORRIFIC! That handsome young doctor was one scared/shocked young man! But we had an AWESOME set of very experienced nursing staff that immediately TOOK charge as best possible.

Equally important to say....just outside the door of our room was some of dearest friends from our church that had stopped by 'just to check on us"...she step to the door...saw what was happening...because the room was chaos and RED---I motioned for her to use her cell phone & start a SPECIAL EMERGENCY PRAYER CHAIN for Jim . We do this constantly---just never thought it would be ME asking for the prayer chain! Within seconds....our church, the Waco Baptist Association of Churches and my Baylor Sr. Choir prayer chains were praying. Thank God....Praise God for the 'Power of Prayer!!!".

And...As the Doctors later stated----'we don 't know WHY the bleeding STARTED....but we have to admit we DO KNOW WHY it stopped....and it wasn't a medical miracle...there was a GREATER Source for this one!

Now when doctors say things like that----it's mighty neat & emphatically true!

Prayers were answered, the bleeding finally stopped----transfusions were then begun, horrible hallucinations began and hubby became mentally confused/fighting tubes/equipment---scared and hurting. I HAD to stand holding his arms---holding his transfusion tubes from 7:30 pm until 4 AM because he was delirious. At midnight, the sweet nurse kept checking and worrying about me standing constantly with the tubes---but if I didn't hold them---he would JERK them out and stop his own new blood replacement that was so greatly needed. Anyway, around midnight the nurse decided to TRY to speed up his transfusion. It worked ok until about 1:30 when he went into cardiac arrest due to the blood coming in too fast for the heart to manage. Then...another All Stat call went out for our room. Again, God was there. His people were there.

Yes, praise God for His miracles/touch/medicines and awesome servants, my hubby finally stood 6 days later and walked 30 steps of VICTORY... after completing 2 different rehabs...he/we received a NEW LIFE.... NEW HEALTH. We have been soooo blessed! Our God and His people are so good!

BUUUUUT-----where does that leave me today----as now I AM FACING THAT SAME SURGERY ON MAY 20TH. Scared silly. He was in greatest health. I am still battling cancer. trials..(twice over) and last one was stage 5 (death sentence)---but God gave me LIFE...via prayer warriors. Today, I have tons of left over health problems, heavy drugs, broken immune system from hospital staff infection that nearly took my life...diabetes, occasional dizziness/damage from having a chemical filled balloon placed inside my body for 8 days followed by having 6 months of radiation treatments done in 5 days ,,,of 2 & 3 treatments per day--12 MRI's of more lengthy radiation--prior to each treatment--to see how my heart and the rest of my body was reacting to the experimental treatments. Not to mention a total of 8 cutting surgeries for the two cancers. (one cutting Before the Novocain had taken effect. arrrg!) Add on a minor ...ha ha.... Sleep Apnea that requires a breathing c-pap machine when the heart stops beating from no oxygen. etc,etc. etc. yatta yatta---- :-D

So, am I really all that sinful....if I honestly say----'YES, I FEAR! .....

I FEAR A LOT''

Again---death is not a problem-----IF my Lord has a 'Heavenly CRUISE ready to sail across that ocean of blue-----believe me----my bags are already packed. I worry for my beloved hubby.

But for the pain ahead of me----I just need YOU.....my prayer partners, friends and family to PRAY for my PAIN and fears, recovery, success and strength. (my hubby ONLY had the fear of the unknown---I have that fear PLUS the fear of WHAT I HAVE ALREADY SEEN/I KNOW from watching him go through it (ha ha... ) ...can ya see I'm TRYING to have a good sense of humor here??? ha

So, again, if you have PRAYER CHAINS....please, would you be so kind and add my name to that listing. I thank you most humbly for all of your past prayers ....(that remains to be the very reason that I AM still ALIVE TODAY). I am humbled and I am grateful, I thank you!So...Lord....Here we go again---"I need THEE every hour....every hour I need Thee".

To all people who have Hurting Feet!

A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a talking centipede, (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for his house.

He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to church with him.. So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to church with me today? We will have a good time." But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to church with me and receive blessings?




But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. He decided to ask him one more time; this time putting his face up against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to church with me and learn about The Lord!?"



A little voice came out of the box:

"I heard you the first time! I'm just putting on my shoes"

~~~~~~~~~~~**


Have a happy day!

Easter and the Grandest Photos of Grandkids....

These are NOT grandchildren...ha ha ---just a warm & fuzzy photo for Easter... of Love, warmth, tenderness and understanding...reflecting that God is Love...our savior and creator of all good and perfect gifts. Salvation! Easter every day & forever!EASTER is my FAVORITE time of the whole year! And what can be neater than KIDS....flowers, baby animals, EASTER egg painting AND praising Jesus for the GRACE & gift of Calvary....our salvation. Normally....I would say..."Nothing can be greater than this...but this year I found that God just gets better.... and He ADDS even more blessings than the above ...when your GRANDCHILD....accepts Christ as her Savior and is BAPTIZED at Easter. Whoa and Wow! NOW....THAT'S truly the 'frosting of your Easter Bunny CAKE...of LIFE AND ETERNITY!!!!
The following are our GRANDKIDS Easter pictures and treasures. We are proud of these kids!



Wow.... TEXAS BLUEBONNETS....Easter Time in Texas....AND
our precious little Chinese Granddaughter Zoe Noel. She is just as cute as her pictures. Like all of her cousins....they all LOVE to POSE for their Mommy's camera.....(er er...wellll... most of the time...ha ha) aaand...Kids R just kids sometimes. haha

Girls love cameras! Our are no different!

Hooray...for our FIRST grandchild...Kori Faith...who is very creative and LOVES painting...especially EASTER EGGS!!!

Her smile matches her personality! She and Zoe (cousins) both love doing all kinds of art, and cooking in the kitchen....their way. ha ha Very entertaining young ladies!

Kori has two zesty 'little brothers'.

Our FIRST GRANDSON, Josh (ua) Dayne---handsome, who is very serious and loving personality. Then, last but not least--- our youngest grandchild, Matthew, is the little man of laughter, pranks and giggles....below. His parents enjoy watching him take naps. ha ha

What can be cuter than a kids perfect smile.....Oriental fries/style..ha ha ..and tons of Bluebonnets? Just a cute shot that needed to be posted.

The 'frosting on the cake' for this Easter...is below--Zoe's baptism.... (our daughter took this shot from the side of the church baptistry...tops for anyone that knows Christ as Lord and Savior.

THIS is the only thing more beautiful than kids being kids & bluebonnets---a Daddy getting the proud honor of BAPTISING his own beautiful little adopted daughter in his pastoral church---after she has told them simply one Saturday night..."Mommy, Daddy, I need to talk----I want to be 'baba..tised cause I want to take Jesus into my harrt"

(how sweet is that?)
Yes, she took classes to learn more about 'Her choice" of believing and following Jesus .Christ...which I think is so wonderful (not totally necessary....but so helpful for her facing the world and life). I have always loved this educational idea and concept.

And---what about this darling.... cute and most charming Zoe smile during baptism?

....it was very perfect for a child...whose FEET kept floating to the top in the water.... (ha ha)

and a Daddy who had a microphone attached to white robe....and is whispering to his precious beloved..... "Zoe, put your feet down...Zoe, put your feet down"...all his whispering....going OUT on the LOUD Speaker to the whole congregation ....who is by now dying laughing/snickering with humor and understanding.

So cute! poor Daddy (but he loved it and ended up ...more or less... 'having to just DUNK her little BOUNCING body beneath the baptismal waters. ha ha Beautiful event...treasured memories and 'FOREVER saved'---suffer not the little children!

Our other grandchildren also attend church regularly and as they reach this stage... there will always be Joy, celebration and treasured blessings to see each follow... as God leads in each of their lives.

(I must say tho----that Zoe's baptism was much better than my own memories of being baptised in the Brazos River...with huge long SNAKES swimming around us kids and the pastor...and teenagers throwing rocks to chase the snakes across the river to the watermelon patch. The snakes made this little prairie dog almost forget totally what baptism was all about at that moment!) Thank God for indoor baptistries!!!

I hope you enjoyed the above. We treasure it. May God continue to bless your life.